Last week on Twitter I got a bit bored and had a go - therefore the majority of them got written under the 140 character limit for tweets - hence why most of them are quite short.
SPAIN
Come on and raise your bottle high
Swing low and quickly stab his thigh
You keep on taking smiley pills
Us boys we have the bestest thrills
SAN MARINO
I didn't know
It's appalling for you
That my song sounds like poo
I didn't know
That you've bought a shot gun
I'm target number one
MONTENEGRO
Feel it... I love snorkeling yeah
I'm gonna swim for your love
Gonna splash, gonna catch fish
I'm gonna hold my breath and hold my nose
CYPRUS
Caught in the middle of watching a porno flick
My mother walked in, was immediatly sick
Under the bed clothes I wank in the moonlight
CROATIA
There was a fight, on the railway, tried so hard to keep away
But there in that pie, cooking away are 4 members of Suede
Please take me back to the
The Mad House
The Mad House
The Mad House
GEORGIA
When I came to... North Aberdeen
I went to Peterhead
Made sure the Loch Ness Monster was really dead
IRELAND
We'll be outside having a bitch... fight
I shagged your brother, pathetic lover
It's a bitch... fight
I tried to smother your stupid mother
LATVIA
I'm making a spreadsheet
of things that I want, things that I need
Like loo roll and chocolate and Speed.
BELARUS
I will help you learn how to drive how, to drive
Stay on the main roads - not the M5, the M5
AZERBAIJAN
This is not satirical
This is not political - I say to you
I'll mime every single note
But I have rigged the vote
We're off to Baku...
MALTA
I feel this song is like bathwater.. bathwater... bathwater
One sat in by a really dirty squatter, a squatter, a squatter
FRANCE
Glue
It's the thing that's making me strong
I'll be sniffing sniffing for
Glue
Like the farts that make a big pong
SWEDEN
I drive a lorry
Do bird watching from the quarry
And I like Corrie
Gets a bit gory
I sit on the lavatory
That's mandatory
SLOVENIA
Cause poo is poo and wee is wee
But both end up in your nappy
I think you find it entertaining
Just wait 'til we do potty training
ISRAEL
Drunk in bars
Pissheads always fallin'
We are... drunk in bars.
We are behind bars,
Did a moonie to a copper
Now behind bars
SWITZERLAND
It's the last roller blind
In the hardware shop, and it's closing time
Gotta buy something quickly
It's the last roller blind
NORWAY
I'll eat a gob....stopper
It's a bubble gum that's hardened, a bubble gum that's hardened.
BELGIUM
Where is Cheshire?
It can snow in Wilmslow my good friends
And in Sproston
Peeps are kind but colour blind and in debt.
GERMANY
Just make some toast for you
Don't make some toast for me
I've got myself a bowl of muesli
Tell me who's smug now!
POLAND
O - O – O – O - I'm up for a fight
That asshole is my wife
O – O – O –O - she is such a tart
And missing a body part
GREECE
We're the fall of the falling star
Come and relax in a spa
We're the fall of the falling star
But we're skint so you're paying the lot
HUNGARY
Million Safeways, a million Prestos
Be proud, shops were epic in the 80's
A million Bejams, a million Kwik Saves
and I so miss the Pioneer
NETHERLANDS
You gotta shut up Douwe, shut up Douwe,
Shut up with your stupid song.
Shut up Douwe, shut up Douwe
Shut up and go light a bong
MACEDONIA
Dona, Dona, Dona, Dona, Dona Chameleon
You come and gooooooo
You come and gooooooo-oooooo-oooooo-ooooooo
DENMARK
Let's be gay men of Hove, gay men of Hove, gay men of Hove tonight
Take my hand and never let go, never let go and let’s be gay men of Hove
AUSTRALIA
Now my nose awakes to the smell of science
And it sneezes to the smell of science
And it sneezes to the smell of science
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